Dec. 10, 2014

By Amber Levenhagen

Being the oldest child, with no close relatives or friends in college, I left for Whitewater with no idea what college would be like. I had the stereotypical idea in my head. It was buff frat guys and cliquey sorority girls ruling the school and “people like me” wouldn’t fit in.

I didn’t apply to a lot of schools; in fact, I applied to only three. With the University of Wisconsin-Whitewater being the only school accepting me, I ended up going to school away from my close group of friends.

Being forced out of my group of friends, I took the opportunity to redefine myself. I hadn’t yet grasped what college was about and ended up partying away my first semester of school.

I had redefined myself into someone I didn’t like. I hadn’t taken school seriously and was suffering the consequences.

Almost getting kicked out of school because of my poor grades gave me a harsh wake up call. I realized the person I had transformed into wasn’t the person I wanted my younger sister to look up to.

I didn’t have much of a relationship with my little sister, and there wasn’t much communication between us. Between the five year age difference and my rebellious phase, I spent very little time with my family.

After I left for school and had my wake up call, I realized I really needed to get my act together. I wanted to be someone my family would be proud of, someone my little sister would look up to and aspire to be like.

I switched my major – out of something I had very little passion for – to something I love and could see myself making into a career. I took a job, added some responsibility that would help me prepare for a life after graduation. I committed to a relationship with a man I feel very strongly for.

After getting my act together, my relationship with my family almost fixed itself. The negativity and stress that built between us over a few years subsided, and I grasped what the college experience truly was about.

In my opinion, college is meant to prepare people for the real world, the real world being where relationships are as important as careers. Experiences in college are meant to help define who you are, not what you need to be. That pursuing something that isn’t a true passion is a waste of time. Happiness is the ultimate goal. Not worrying about redefining yourself to fit in with the crowd. That finding those friends who you can connect with on a real level is more important than pretending to be someone you’re not.