Presidents’ Day means hail to the sale!

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Dauntae Green

Information Technology major Tyler LoPiore sits on a classy inflatable futon in his Knilans Hall dorm room. Can futons seriously be any more amazing?

Dauntae Green, Lifestyle Editor

Sofa sales, mattress mayhem, fabulous futons! It’s Presidents’ Day and that means you can’t do anything without a furniture ad in your face.

So instead of remembering those old white guys, we’re saying hail to the sale! You know what’s going on. It’s that time of the season to celebrate the furniture we have in our homes! You go ahead and celebrate Presidents’ Day – we’ll celebrate that amazing futon that’s gotten you through your young adult life. The following tributes are for futons, couches, beds, mattresses, lawn chairs, folding tables and more. You better appreciate the furniture that you have, buy them from stores that are on sale and do all that crazy college stuff with ’em! Welcome to the world of celebrating furniture on Presidents’ Day!

“I believe the reason that furniture stores do Presidents’ Day Sales are for discount opportunities and to give back to the community. Whenever people get off on that day, it becomes an opportunity to make discounts on futons, mattresses, and other things to make things easier for the customers on this holiday. It is also a way to show that the stores are giving back to the community by celebrating the holiday with the discounts and show of support,” said Yovani Mendoza, a manager at Leon Furniture store in downtown Whitewater.

You see, Presidents’ Day sales highlight our beautiful capitalist democracy that gives you the power to purchase! Put it on the card, baby! 

You can go do so many things to have fun with your furniture! Of course they are needed for utility, but you can also decorate to your heart’s content. Sit back and relax in that futon while you watch the game. Fold it out like a chaise lounge. Now extend it to sleep on.  God bless William Brouwer who so ingeniously created the fabulous futon. It’s seriously magic in a piece of furniture.

Let’s have a pillow fight! Jump up and down on the mattresses like you did when you were a kid! Make a blanket fort with your furniture in your room! Play a game of the floor is lava with your friends! And of course you can just do what most people do in the pandemic: watch TV, work at their job, do schoolwork, attend meetings online . . . but at least you can do those in a zillion different positions on your futon! 

It’s time to appreciate our furniture, have pride in our purchases, and buy new ones from that Presidents’ Day sale! Yeah, we know what happened on that chair. That throw blanket isn’t hiding nothin’! Time to spend some dollars. Futons, couches, tables, mattresses, chairs, tables and beds – WE SALUTE YOU! 

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